I was very happy this past weekend to party on Governor's Island and see the Freemasons first U.S. appearance. The final weekend of the summer was very festive for sure. I met a lot of friends both old and new and had a good time till the last song. Saw Christian, Brett, Alex, James and Joe MG. At the end I left and rode back with Jackie and Vervin. The ferry ride back to the mainland was anti-climactic as was walking back to City Hall so I could catch a taxi back to BK. But getting home OK was its own reward.With the arrival of fall the difference between the day and the night is readily apparent. Having to carry a jacket with one reminds me of my trips to San Francisco, or to
Amsterdam. I can deal with being prepared for the day as well as the night as I have always been a fan of being prepared for whatever. The days are getting shorter and time for the reign of the night is at hand. This also means the time of the year when I have also had more issues with getting up and going home without incident.However this year my winter wear is far more advanced than any times past and my knowledge of what to expect and how to continue is more advanced than ever.
As I am still unsure of what to do with my days, and how to manage my time in-between weekends, I will continue to devise new means of occupying myself. Any sort of writing at all (even on my blog) goes towards shattering my writer's block. Or at least provide an outlet for the words I need to have expressed.
I still don't have my next purpose mapped out but at the very least I am getting a better sense of what it should be. I have been in a sort of limbo for far too long and I need to settle, and reorient and at least devise a plan of action. I've been flying by the seat of my pants for quite a while now and now that I actually have to worry about paying for my med coverage I now have a sort of incentive to do something that pays my bills and not just stuff that makes bills.
It was true that I needed a break and a time to re-orient after working for the company for so long but at the same time I can't let my bad experience color my outlook on all future types of gainful employment. Until I have reached a certain level of independence I still need to keep that sort of option open. I still have my friends but I have yet to have the desire to push any sort of dependence on any of them yet for job offers, placement, people to give resume's to or the like. It will be some time before we reach that level of need let alone the desire.
For now I will continue as we have done and let my dreams and interests guide my focus and do my best to keep my mind open until I am doing what I need to do, and I am in the place that I need to be. The day is coming and I am insomniac through the night awaiting that dawn.
