The end of the month draws closer. Fun times are only only fun for a little while. The real world beckons. And distraction rears its ugly head. I should have learned from all the times before how from without comes so much at once even I can be overwhelmed if I don't plan accordingly. So many times I am so nice, so giving of my time and myself that I am led beyond the precipice.Like my time and energy are endless and I can give like the well is never dry. Humanity is mine to enjoy. No angelic pleasures for me but rather the life that is meant to be enjoyed and the friends that are there to enjoy it with me. Some need more help to smile than others. But in the end they all do smile.
Or at least they are supposed to. If they get the joke. I have enjoyed my weekends immensely and I have been doing a good job with my fun times but sometimes its not funny when something funny happens to you. Yes, yes even I can have the days when I am not feeling like myself and I am either sick or just illin.
Normally, I bring the full force of my good time with me as I go. Nothing done halfway. But some of the friends feel like my energy is for them to vampire at will. That my energy in my life, that I work hard as hell to develop and though freely given, should be funnelled down to the trivialities that they are currently experiencing and seek to dilute my good time and my experience.
My story is important to me. No one's good time should carry over and impinge upon the good times of others. Some are becoming liabilities. They must realize this. But soon it will be unavoidable.
Another draw of energy is advice. People tell me their issues. I tell them what they should be doing. I don't get paid for this (yet) but I know what I am talking about and I do what I can to find out more so that this will continue. People who don't listen to what I say when I offer advice that was asked for are NO LONGER entitled to tell me the sob story of what occurred afterward when my advice was ignored and not followed. I know that life is full of travails and sad moments but life has its good moments and high points too. If a person will only wallow in the bad moments and not actively seek out the higher points for themselves and their families then they deserve their lot in the mud pits of their life.
If you are not going to reach for the higher branches then you better be prepared to eat a lot of grass because the good stuff is up in the trees. The fruit that falls on the ground has lost the good points and is now just ready to die. I want the life that is still alive and ready to be plucked from the midst of the trees. I know it's not easy to get but I will climb up and jump high enough to get it.
Until my next jumping chance rolls around I will continue to take care of myself and prepare for the times as they come. I think instead of falling too far I just tripped. I will recover quickly and keep it moving.
I will not allow the negative ions to settle on myself and weigh me down. My life and my mission of my life is too important to let too many moths sit on my light and plunge us all into the darkness.
I just cannot let that happen. I will promise myself that much. And I will live and learn and love the way it is supposed to be done. There is no precedent because no one else will live this life. It is up to me to do it correctly.
I know the way. I will take the first step. And I will move the in the direction and the manner in which I wish.
